"Candi. Rachel Candice Burton. Pretty much only mom, maybe a few of her teachers, called her Rachel. Even dad and me called her Candi. She turned twenty-two this past February." Sam's voice is steady, and surprisingly deep. Not a squeak or crack.
Twenty-two. I do some more mental math. She would have been born when I was about six, meaning she was conceived over a year after my dad remarried. Still, almost seven years until Sam came along. Something still feels wrong.
"She used to look after me most of the time, at least from the time I can remember. She was the one who would be here for me after school. She was the one who would look stay with me at night whenever mom and dad went out. Even though she was in high school, she was there for me. Then, she went off to college. Mom was hoping she would say in New York, but she wanted to get into a huge psychology program at North Carolina. No, North Carolina State. I always get those schools confused."
As a University of Kentucky grad, there is no way to get this two confused. Trust me. But then, Sam doesn't look like much of a collegiate sport follower.
"She would always come home for holidays and breaks. Then, at Thanksgiving, two years ago, she started acting strange. She came home for the weekend, but went out with an ex-boyfriend of hers from high school. Just friends now. He used to call her "Moonlight" or something like that. Name came form that My Little Pony cartoon."
"Twilight Sparkle." Me and my stupid need to correct people. At least that makes me a good proofreader and editor. Sam gives me a slightly puzzled look and continues.
"Still, she seemed a little off. When she left, she was somewhat distant. At Christmas, things were just wrong. She didn't get gifts for anyone. She had always had at least something, like a handmade card, for everyone. Not that year. She spent much of her time with another one of her old friends, who had also came back here from college. She wouldn't talk to anyone after that. She even left for school early, without saying goodbye to anyone, Not even me."
I could hear a trace of remorse in his voice. He was fidgeting again. I know he's got something behind behind his back, but I can't tell what. He's beginning to stare down again. This is getting painful for him. I can almost see how this ends.
"She didn't come home for Easter or spring break. She called saying she had some big project to work on. Supposedly, she just wasn't going off with friends somewhere, although that was what my dad was thinking at the time. Then, she called to say she landed a huge internship for the summer and that she wouldn't be able to come home. My mom freaked out, but dad managed to calm her down, barely. She would call and text us, but she never came home."
He is almost on the verge of tears. Maybe I should stop him, but I can't. He needs to let this come out. I hope I'm wrong about what happened. Please let me be wrong.
"Then, last August, dad sent in the in the money for Candi's tuition, like he always did. She had scholarships and junk, but there was still a little bit more that had to be paid. Anyway, a few days later, the school notified him saying that Candi had dropped out last semester and that she wasn't scheduled to be back for this semester, either. The next time she called, both mom and dad tried to find out what was wrong. She stopped calling back after that. She would sent email, and even mailed us letters, letting us know she was alright, but we had no way to directly contact her. She email always came from secondary sources; the letters delivered through an intermediary. She was okay, but gone."
Sam's speech has gotten practiced, as if someone has fed him the words he had to say. No way a fourteen year old would use some of those words. I am feeling that he is hiding more than he is saying.
"When she wouldn't even come home for Christmas, mom and dad tried to change tactics. We couldn't call the police. She was an adult, technically, and was keeping contact with us, in a way. That's when dad called in the private investigators. He hadn't had contact with them since his father died. They worked with the family's attorneys. It took them five months of searching, but they finally found her. She had been arrested and put in jail in Charlotte. She was using an assumed name. That was why we couldn't find her sooner."
Must have been the same crew that was charged with trying to find me when mom went off. Yet, why were they looking for me? Was it guilt from dad for not trying harder when I was a kid? Maybe, the investigators just wanted to take care of unfinished business. Something is not adding up. It takes me a second to realize that Sam has stopped talking. He is still fidgeting though. He is now looking form side to side instead of straight down. What is he hiding?
"Go on. What happened next? Why was Candi in jail?" I ask him. In my head, I do some more math. Five months would equal to now. She was found in the past few weeks. Maybe just before me.
Sam doesn't say anything. After a few seconds of agonizing, he hands me the object he was holding behind his back. It is a phone. He places it on the desk before me and activates a stored call.
"Here. This will tell you all you need to know." His voice starts to crack again, but from emotion this time.
"Sam, it's Mom."
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